Dating Today

I was the type of child and teenager that wanted to please everyone: teachers, friends, my friends’ parents, my parents, etc. It was ingrained in me to be a people pleaser. So, you can imagine the shock I felt as I got older and realized that nobody can please everyone all the time, and you’d be lucky to please some of the people some of the time. If I got into an argument with anyone, I would apologize first and make sure, “We’re okay, right?” But as the decades have come and gone, I am more accepting of that saying. Sometimes, depending on the situation, I don’t care if my actions or words anger/annoy/frustrate someone. I’m too tired or fed up to care if everyone likes me. I’d love to be Sally Fields, but I’m not. I’m me, and the only person who has to love and like me is me (and my family).

Dear Goldy:

I don’t even know what to say or how to start. But I want to make sure I am as anonymous as possible. This account, from which I’m sending you this email, was just created for me to send this email.

One hope that we all share when about to go out on a date – whether it’s a first date or a tenth date – is wanting to have a good time. Everyone wants to have fun on a date. It’s painful to sit through a date where you’re either bored to death or you’re sitting there trying to pull teeth in order to have a simple conversation to get to know him/her, not even trying and sitting and embracing the awkward silence.

Dear Goldy:

Let me break down the last five years of my life for you in terms of me and my boyfriend. I’ve been dating him for five years. For the first two years he didn’t introduce me to his family, because he wanted to wait until his divorce was final and he didn’t want his ex to find out about me. So, I was the secret girlfriend.

Dear Goldy:

I’m 30, still single, and want to get married. I think you’d be proud of me, because I’m not one of those girls who has a list, and I deal with shadchanim directly. I always have. I’m very realistic about what type of person I’m looking for. I know what I am and what I’m not, so I’m not looking for someone out of my league either.

Dear Goldy:

 Shadchanim have been asking me about my son since he was 16. I always heard, “Call me in a few years. I have a girl for him.” My son is good looking, tall, with a great personality – basically he’s the total package. So why has he been dating for three years? Every girl he gets set up with isn’t for him: too dull, too frum, not pretty enough.