Queens Jewish Link
Connecting the Queens Jewish Community 
There is a fundamental truth of existence that pain is inevitable. It is an intrinsic part of life. Some of us take ill, lose our jobs, and eventually lose even our loved ones. But have you noticed that the greatest affliction and adversity hardly affects some, while the smallest inconvenience leaves others in a perpetual state of misery?
How good are you at persevering through hard times? Do you feel mentally strong? When faced with adversity, do you come apart or just cave in? Perhaps you need to learn how to bounce back to endure life’s hard knocks and ill fortune.
Do you ever feel as though you undermine your own agenda? You made some irrational choices and perhaps even experienced physical symptoms throughout the day. You ordered four more things from Amazon that you clearly do not need. I know. At this point you feel like they should save a seat for you at the dinner for your Amazon delivery guy. You missed the gym for two years in a row now and you simply aren’t getting where you wish to be in life. Speaking of which, people who think a minute goes fast have clearly never done a plank.
Do you care if others are aware of and accept your feelings? Does he give credence to your moments of sadness or anxiety? Does she support you when you are overwhelmed with anger or uneasiness? When was the last time someone said: “I can see that you are truly upset today. How can I help?” Or: “You seem unusually down in the dumps. I’m so sorry.”
When was the last time you conjured up one of a million excuses for not doing something you really should? You may be justifying your choices and lifestyle simply out of fear of change or perhaps an aversion to discomfort. You may have always wished for a more fulfilling career, but you seem to always find what you call good reasons to stay put. You thought you wanted a career, but it turns out all you wanted were paychecks. I love asking kids what they want to be when they grow up, because I’m still looking for ideas.
Is it too theoretical or abstract to ask if people can actually change? If someone you care for or love inflicts pain on you time and time again, you may just begin to ask yourself that question. It may be someone you are incredibly emotionally invested in, and you do not want to simply walk away.
