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Sometimes people need to be reminded of how to date, and when I say “How To…” I mean getting back to basics. I’m not talking about how to be suave or to “play the game.” I’m not into that. With all the crazy dating stories I’ve heard from people, read about, been asked about… my mouth just hangs open in disgust and/or amazement depending on what I’m told. I’m left speechless. In honor of all of those, I’m getting us all back to the simple basics of dating. Start with these five common-sense tips and hopefully there will be many dates in your future.

I will warn readers that the topic I chose to write about is very sensitive. Some may take offense that the QJL, “a family paper,” chose to print an article such as this. But as I have said many times, I won’t shy away from topics that make people uncomfortable. This is a newspaper and an issue that is occurring more and more in the frum community. I felt that this was the time to address it. I say that because I have received a number of letters like this one. I chose this letter (received three months ago) because it was the most family-friendly with the language used.

Dear Goldy,

I want to know what your opinion is.

I published quotable quotes from emails about four years ago. I think it’s time for part deux.

Dear Goldy,

I should’ve sent this letter to you weeks ago, but I didn’t. Hopefully it will make it to you in time for the chagim because that’s why I’m writing. I got busy—one thing to do after another—and none of them have to do with caring for my family because I’m single.

This issue is more common than many may think. We speak about our actual family and our work family. I’m still in touch with members of my work family, and I haven’t worked with them in five years! I interviewed, hired, and trained them—and, most importantly, spent 35 hours a week with them. I was able to rely on them when I needed help, and they were able to count on me when the time came for it. We know each other’s children and siblings from everyone visiting the office. I have a picture on my phone that I love looking at: my daughter, at two years old, watching her iPad in one of the visitors’ chairs in my office, with two boys looking over her shoulder. The boys were the sons of one of my staff member’s children—from a very Chassidish family. I guess it was a no-school day. My daughter was watching Cocomelon, but these boys had never watched Cocomelon. All members of my staff laughed. It was simple nursery rhymes, but these boys had never seen these graphics. Their eyes were glued to the screen.