Opinion

Do you find yourself wanting to help someone but not being quite sure what she is in need of? You want to be of service to him or deepen your bond perhaps. But what can you plausibly offer others? Do you even know?

When we see others suffer, oftentimes we vicariously agonize for them, too. We can even get compassion fatigue if we have continued exposure to others’ distress. Many of us feel uneasy going about our daily lives, even if the trauma is not directly related to our current situation, because in fact – it is.

What is love, my friends? There are a myriad of ideas that enjoy powerful cultural endorsement, but are they true? Is love an exciting feeling when you are around him? Is love simply having common interests and shared values with her? I know. You want him to look at you the same way you look at chocolate cake. I get it.

Honestly, do you find flaws in everything and nearly everyone? Yes, there is a boatload of negativity in the world. Humans can be selfish and cruel. He took advantage of you. She deceived you. Well, that is only one version of the world, sweet friends. I get it. Turn me over. I’m done on this side.

Are you good at friendship? What sort of character do you wish to find in a friend? Does she know how to show vulnerability or weakness? Does he trust you enough to confess some failures? Is she interested in your challenges and troubles, too?

You may recall with ease a pleasant day at the beach with your family when you were but seven years old. Sure, call me on my shell phone. Memories of intense terror or fear, however, are oftentimes denied or hidden by our very mind to protect us. Is there a scale of awfulness on which we can even measure our trauma?