Halachic Highlights

Question: Should a burial be delayed more than one day in order to enable a close relative to attend the burial?

 Short Answer: A burial should not be delayed even until the night or next day. However, many poskim allow delaying a burial less than 24 hours in order to enable additional relatives to attend.

Question: May the same person serve as sandak for two children in the same family?

 Short Answer: While the Rama appears to disallow it, many allow an important person or close family member (such as a grandfather) to serve as sandak more than once for the same family.

Question: What is the proper date of the first yahrzeit, the date of death or the date of burial? 

Short Answer: The Mishnah B’rurah rules that the yahrzeit is observed on the date of death in all years. However, many poskim, including Rav Moshe Feinstein zt”l, disagree and rule that where the date of burial is three (or possibly, even two) days after the date of death, the first yahrzeit is observed on the date of burial and all subsequent yahrzeits are observed on the date of death.

Question: May a woman serve as a sandak at a bris milah? 

Short Answer: A woman should not serve as a sandak where there are men available. Different reasons are suggested for this custom.

[In response to numerous people requesting articles on Aveilus, we present this series. May the learning of these laws be a z’chus for arichas yamim and good health for all.]

Question: At what point should the person making the Borei P’ri HaGafen drink the wine at a bris milah?

 Short Answer: While there are multiple opinions on this issue, the prevailing custom appears to be to delay the drinking until after the K’rias Sheim (albeit giving the baby a taste beforehand). Nevertheless, Rav Moshe Feinstein zt”l and other poskim held that a small sip should be drunk before the K’rias Sheim.